It's Been a While...

It's been a while
since I've been here to update....

and it's been a while
since I've been inventive in the kitchen

It's been a while
since I've felt like I could describe this space I'm in

and it's been a while
since I've felt like I could confide in any one.

But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means

It's been a while
Since I've been free to do just what I want to do

It's been a while
Since I could say I love myself as well and

It's been a while
Since I haven't worried about my dad

It's been a while
Since I've been able to let all of that go

But everything I can't let go of hovers around me and it may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
I've lost sight of what I can be if I want to be

Why must i feel this way?
just make this go away
just one more peaceful day

Its been awhile
Since I could look at myself
and see me uncritically
since I don't know when
It's been awhile
Since I've felt the freedom that I long to feel
It's been awhile
But I can still remember just the way it tastes
But everything I can't remember can come back to me
will come back to me
will come back to me

It's been a while....


~with apologies to Staind...