Wallpaper:

...the devil's foray into home decorating.

I've been plugging away this week at stripping the wallpaper out of the downstairs bedroom at my dad's house. It used to be my grandparent's bedroom; they built this house in 1973, and it was the original wallpaper. Old, inexpensive, and a pain in the patooty to get off the walls. However: success! All of the wallpaper is gone, and half the walls have been cleaned in preparation for painting.

This little renovation project is serving a dual purpose in my world. One: it prepares the room to either be an office/guestbedroom (as I'm tricking it out at the moment); or, when my dad gets around to hiring a contractor to put a shower in the downstairs bathroom that won't compromise you if you drop the soap (the one in there now is WEE!), he can move downstairs, which will save him money heating the house in the winter.

Two: in about six months, I'll be moving into my very own home--mortgage and all. Doing this kind of (tedious) work on my dad's house has helped me feel a little more prepared for owning my own place. I figure, if I can handle doing this kind of work without freaking out, I can cope with being a homeowner. Okay, the logic works in my world--perhaps not anyone else's, but whatever.

So this week will hold:
Monday: finish prepping the walls for paint, paint the ceiling
Tuesday: Tear the carpet out (mmmm. bright blue carpet--buh-BYE! Make way for hardwood flooring!).
Wednesday: Paint the walls, trot the carpet off to the Transfer Station.
Thursday: Second coat? and Ryan, Alicia, and I get a lesson on laying hardwood floors.
Friday: Floors!

On Monday, the futon arrives--just in time for me to move down from the upstairs bedroom so my brother and the boys have a place to sleep. I'm leaving it to my brother to move the computer and its accoutrement out of the living room and into the office--and also leaving him the task of organizing my father in business matters, etc.

I think it's a pretty fair division of duties!

However, my top priority at this moment: SHOWER!

I stink.

It's Been a While...

It's been a while
since I've been here to update....

and it's been a while
since I've been inventive in the kitchen

It's been a while
since I've felt like I could describe this space I'm in

and it's been a while
since I've felt like I could confide in any one.

But everything I can't remember as fucked up as it may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
I've stretched myself beyond my means

It's been a while
Since I've been free to do just what I want to do

It's been a while
Since I could say I love myself as well and

It's been a while
Since I haven't worried about my dad

It's been a while
Since I've been able to let all of that go

But everything I can't let go of hovers around me and it may seem
the consequences that I've rendered
I've lost sight of what I can be if I want to be

Why must i feel this way?
just make this go away
just one more peaceful day

Its been awhile
Since I could look at myself
and see me uncritically
since I don't know when
It's been awhile
Since I've felt the freedom that I long to feel
It's been awhile
But I can still remember just the way it tastes
But everything I can't remember can come back to me
will come back to me
will come back to me

It's been a while....


~with apologies to Staind...